Our Hangout

I love Living Rooms (small groups)

Truth of the matter is, I love community. I say that because not every small group environment, whatever you call them, leads to true biblical community.

In my life, however, I have been fortunate and priviliged to be a part of several small groups that began to experience community.

You never know what's going to trigger community. But in every small group where I've seen it come alive there were no warning signs, nothing that told you, tonight's going to be the night.

But in every group where I've experienced real community, there was usually one event that was a catalyst to our beginning to experience and delve deeper into the experience of Biblical community.

I wish I could go into details, but confidentiality prevents me from doing so. I wish I could not because I would like to gossip about it, but because I'd love for you to see the depth of it, and that it is possible. I say that, because many of us, throughout our Christian experience don't experience deep community very often.

Anyway, I will say this, after a rather average meeting this past week. We moved on to our prayer time as a group. And out of nowhere, without warning, it happened. One person came clean. They decided ten and there that they weren't going to live a lie anymore. And so confession took place. By the way, often confession is the catalyst to real community.

Something happens when someone confesses to a community. I know because I've been there. If you've lived with a secret for a long enough time, the kind of secret that Satan says, "if you tell, they won't accept you, if you tell you'll be destroyed." When you live with that kind of lie for long enough, the thought of coming clean tears you apart. Everything about you wants to. Everything about you fears it. But one person, wanted to be clean more than they wanted to appear clean and so they confessed. Then in tears, realized what they hoped might be true but had been too afraid to find out. Once they were exposed the others in the room didn't pick up stones or condemn. They loved as Jesus did. Tears of guilt became tears of joy. And what minutes before had been hopelessness, in the face of confession and within community turned to hope.

Something neat happens to the rest of the group when one person in a group finally has the guts to come clean, to confess, to believe that God has more for them than the guilt they've known for so long. It becomes contagious! Others begin to realize that maybe they too could be honest. And if one person was loved in their shame, maybe they could be loved to. And then without any warning, the floodgates open up and amidst tears, fear, courage, insecurity the light overcomes the darkness and freedom has a chance to reign in places where previously it had been given no access.

And for this reason I love Living Rooms or whatever you choose to call your small group environments. Those environments create the potential for this to happen. Sunday morning is not usually an environment that allows for this, that's unfortunate, but it's just the way we've come to do church.

Now, these moments don't happen every week. But I know something, after last week, our group will never be the same again.

How should a pastor lead?

Over the last decade I've had the opportunity to take in many pastoral conferences. To read some of the brightest minds (I think, anyway) on the issue of church and, in particular, pastoral leadership. To look at the lives of pastors who are considered successful. To watch those who don't get too much airtime, and will never be asked for their opinion on a current event covered by Time Magazinge. I've also had some good opportunities to read and discuss and think much on the issue as well. Now even though, I start off saying all that, I'm no expert! I do have some opinions and since my life is undergoing change in this area, I'll share some of them. I'm pretty sure there's nothing I'm going to say that's new, but it's what's being real to me in this season of my life.

Many years ago I came to a realization, the issue isn't so much about what I can and can't do, but where am I anchored. That is, there are things I can accomplish on personal talent, giftedness, charm, and my ability to relate to most people. There's a chance that I can even create a pretty spiritual looking institution that most people would call a church based simply on those things. I could probably visit people, help them, counsel them, baptize, marry, burry and even preach to them week to week on my own strength. Some would argue here, I understand.

Here's my point, I've realized several things. Something others have realized before me. The best place to lead from is from a place of followership. Or as Jesus said, the best place to follow & lead is by remaining yoked to him. Remaining connected to the vine. (All pictures not unfamiliar, but not really common to us westerners) The answer is abiding in him.

You see the issue isn't that you can't lead a church on your own strength or not. I wish I'd understood this earlier on, but you really can. You can lead an institution and make it apparently successful, when measuring success by the standards of our culture. You really, really can!!!

But the issue is what will is being built and what eternal value will it have?

One of Jesus' principles that impacting more and more is the concept of abiding in him and of being yoked to him. A concept he tried to illustrate by talking about where his authority and leadership was centered, stemmed from...

"I tell you the truth, the Son can do nothing by himself; he can do only what he sees his Father doing, because whatever the Father does the Son also does.

Don't you believe that I am in the Father, and that the Father is in me? The words I say to you are not just my own. Rather, it is the Father, living in me, who is doing his work.

I guess the question I've been asking myself is, how do I lead this way? How do I get to the place where I am actually truthful in saying, nothing I can do is of any value unless it's based on what I see Jesus & the Father doing. The things I do and the words I speak are done because Jesus is living in me. It's easy to say that, it's easy to appear that that's reality, But what needs to happen so it's really the truth and not appearance?

I'm finding there's a couple of things that I think need to happen. There needs to be much prayer. And you need to lead in community. Like I said before, I'm not saying anything new today. But I think these things are crucial for the man or woman of God who's been entrusted with leading God's people, at any level. from Sunday School to the pulpit.

Pray lots about everything! Give prayer top priority in your ministry. Truth is, I'm only really figuring this out this past year. Or maybe the truth is, I've finally come to a place where I realize all the success that I can accomplish on my own is only skin deep. No matter what it might appear like to others. Truth is many of the circumstances are finally so far out of my place of comfort and expertise (it really didn't take much). That I know I can't do it on my own ability. I need more. I'm also finding when I start giving up excuses like, I can't concentrate long enough and I'm just not a prayer warrior, then I'm left with only one reality, if I'm going to be a successful leader I must pray lots and about everything. I used to feel guilty about this. Now the reality is simple, don't surrender it to God, don't expect God results. That doesn't mean large numbers flooding the doors of my church, at least it hasn't meant that. But it does mean that I can be at peace with where I am, and where we are as a church, because I know everything is being placed on God's hands and out of mine. In light of that I'm also calling our church to this...I'll keep you posted.

The other thing I'm learning is that leadership must happen in community. Most pastors I know are lone rangers. I used to be a lone ranger. Don't get me wrong, I still have a ways to go here. Almost every week I find another way this needs to change. But I'm trying to learn and surrender. I think the biggest issue here is not just accountability, but accountability to people who really know us. I find that it's easy to be what I want others to think I am. It's just way too easy to relate at that level. And although you probably can't do it with everyone, you need to find at least one or two people who you can get to the place of letting them into your inner world, all of it. This might be the hardest thing you do, but eventually it's the most freeing, as well as the most protective thing I think you can do to keep you grounded and faithful. Actually this is not just true for pastors, but for any follower of Christ.

These are the things that I'm learning, the things that continue to shape who I am, how I follow, and how I lead.

His is the glory!

Today I ran into one of the people (girl) who committed their life to Christ yesterday. And we had a great conversation...in which she said things like..."it was as if God was speaking directly to me!"

I'm always scared to ask for a then and there kind of decision...especially when pride kicks in and you wonder how it'll reflect on you if no one stands up or decides anything. But I know it's not about me and sometimes the moment is just ripe and you take a chance and you hope and people surrender, just because it was their time, it was their moment and God was in it...many times, perhaps most, inspite of you. And someone who belonged to one Kingdom takes up residency in the one Kingdom worth living in.

Yesterday was like that...as I watched those people stand up...I didn't keep count...but honestly now I wish i did...I'm hoping somebody did...afterall, these people need follow up. But that's all beside the point...as they stood there acknowleging that this Christmas they wanted in or they wanted back in with Jesus...and as the rest of us cheered, for them and for God...it was awesome.

Each one of them has a story. Many of them having just come out of rehab are going back to places where the safety is not there. One of the girls came to me after the service and only said, "My grandmother would be so proud right now." I hope to be able to continue that conversation. Another girl said, "I'm going to come all the time now and next week I'm bringing my mother." Her boyfriend also stood up.

Remember the gentleman that several months ago his wife came and said, "Next week I'm bringing my husband."? Well, he stood and afterwards he was different...until yesterday there had always been a heavyness in his face. Yesterday with a huge smile on his face he looked at me and said..."so, see you next week!"

God is good! I can't wait for Baptism time...I'm thinking hard on this one...but boy I think this will be fun! What I'm I saying, this is fun already!

God - receive the glory!

hearing God...

When the service ended last weekend one of our "special" adults came up to me and said..."it's not fair, God can see us, but we can't see him. Do you understand what I mean?"
This was just after I spoke on prayer.

Later in the week a friend, who's been under attack lately and has been "in full-time ministry" for more years than I've been alive, shared how God has been showing how he understood God's love propositionally, but it wasn't until recently that he was able to "see" God's love - and he saw it in how he was being loved by his Christian family and friends during a hard time.

One of the points he made, casually, and in passing, was this...some people say they hear God, but I don't know about that.

Okay, here's where I'm going...what does it mean when people say, "I heard God say?" or "God told me..." - what do people really mean?

Some people will qualify that with "in my heart" and the rest of us can relate more. But often it's as if people are suggesting they really do hear God as in "audibly." Some people will say...it was as clear if he had spoken...so after listening to this "man of God" share...I decided to examine myself.

I don't usuallly use words/phrases like "and God told me/said to me/spoke to me" not because sometimes I don't have the real sense that he did, but because I don't like to mislead people.

Where I'm going with this...when I've done spiritual gift surveys and the like (and I've done more than my share) there's one gift that always stands out above the rest - discernment. That'll make sense in a second.

I seek the Spirit and have often prayed to hear him clearly, I want, more than anything (most of the time) to have him have his way with me, to move freely, so speak, to guide etc.

But at the end of the day, the closest I think I've ever come to listening to God, hearing him talk is through what most of us would call intuition. Things like promptings etc fall here for me. The interesting things this is where discernment (intuition) - I know discernment is from God, intuition is an internal thing - however, when it actually happens, the line is not so clear as to what's really happening, so I use that loosely.

My point, I'm told I have the gift of discernment. I often find my "discernment/what feels a lot like intuition) leads in me in certain directions, to do certain things, have certain conversations, ask people directly about specific things)...and more than not, this intuition is, usually, pretty much on the money. In the end I assume it's got to be God.

But I have to confess with my brother...I've never heard God say, "Ed, go talk to that person", not in the same sense that we hear of Moses or Jonah etc. But I hear many Christians talk as if that's they're experience. Usually when I listen to them it makes me feel like I'm missing something. Like somehow there's something in my life that must not be lined up with God, something that I haven't given up, something that's a barrier to really hearing God.

I've heard many other Christians, especially recently, express the same thing.

My point...I wish that people were a little more clear when they spoke about God speaking to them. That if what they meant was, I sensed God saying - that they'd say that!

I also would hope people, when seeking God, would act more on their "intuition" and do what "it feels like they should do at the time."

I think there's a lot of confusion on this on and many Christians, really seeking God and trying to listen to him that feel like second class citizens of the Kingdom.

I'm not saying God only speaks one way...I'm just saying, verbal (the audible kind) from heaven is not, doesn't happen as often as some people make it seem like it does. Although, I believe God is speaking "all the time" for those who are willing to listen. And listening isn't as hard as some would make it.

Anyway, maybe it makes some sort of sense, if not I was able to express myself and work it out a little bit better.

I confess because of the traditions I grew up in, there's areas of this that I'm a babe in and have much to learn. Recently I saw someone (a friend) give "a word from the Lord." I struggle with this, I won't lie, I really do, but my inexperience in something doesn't negate something. But that's a whole other post.

Most of all I want to be open to whatever God - the Holy Spirit would have free reign with and through me. But I also get worried when I see certain things become elitism in the body. I don't like swinging pendulums to extremes to avoid other extremes...most of all I just want to follow Jesus, with all that means...

About Accountability

The dialogue on the recent "Pastoring" post has caused me to think about accountability.

There's lots of talk that goes on in church circles about accountability, but in truth there's very little accountability that goes on.

At best, and yes, this is just my opinion, what most people call accountability is what I think of as "controlled revelation."

Here's what I mean by that...
We invite people to speak into our lives, but don't really let them into all the areas of our lives - although I believe you could/should have more than one person speaking into different areas of your life.

However, those areas we let others speak into, are often shallow and don't allow them to see who we really are, or what's really going on in the heart. We confess things that are easy to confess and we present them with what we want them to see.

Often we'll pick someone and we let the whole world know they're our accountability partner, but when we talk the conversation never goes really deep, or how deep it needs to go. This makes us feel good about ourselves, without ever really being accountable.

Church history tells us that at one point in the early church, when you became a Christian (and I don't know how this worked) you were assigned? to a more mature Christian - this person was a part of your life for the first year of your journey. You spent tonnes of time together and they served as, what we would call a mentor today. But they walked with you and they got to really speak into your life.

If accountability is to really be accountability, the people who have permission to speak into your life, must have permission to see your life as it really is and speak into it deeply.

The nature of this shows how carefully we should choose our accountability partners. They should be people who are not afraid to challenge you on anything and everything. But they should also be people whose desire is to see Christ formed in you and not just to point out your faults - that's how Satan works - not God.

There are plenty of people that would love to speak into your life! Some of them, outright hurtful people are easy to spot - STAY AWAY! But sometimes even very well meaning friends, have their vision clouded by all kinds of other issues. Sometimes, you can't know this until you're in the relationship - but even if you've asked someone to speak into your life, if they start doing it in ways that aren't to heal and help you become more like Christ. For your own good - take away that permission - just because someone wants or things they should speak into your life, it doesn't mean you have to let them. Be gentle and respectful...but protect yourself.

Choose wisely, and accountability will be something that will deepen your journey with Jesus.

Finally...find someone and let them speak into your life. Let it be someone you can trust with your heart, someone who you know won't judge, but will lovingly point out what will make you more like Christ...and listen to them, because Jesus will have a lot to say to you through them.

Worship Time

Drove in this morning listening to this, it's the "Let your glory fall" worship together - revival generation cd. Really great stuff on it, several years old. Anyway, I started singing and before I knew it I had the stereo blaring and I was singing at the top of my lungs in rushhour traffic, and I just didn't care. It was a good time!

His Jealous Love

Wilsonian has a very real and honest post that prompted these thoughts today...

Jealousy is not seen as a positive emotion. Words like discipline and rebuke, also don't usually strike us as positive. Yet, God's word uses these terms in relationship with God's love, in ways that are supposed to strike us as nurturing and healing.

Hebrews 12 talks about the fact that God disciplines those he loves. The word is even rendered as rebukes in some translations. Maybe it's just me, but for many years, every time I read that, I cringed. Because of my very strict upbringing words like rebuke & discipline haven't always felt closely tied in to a healthy nurturing love. I knew it was supposed to be a positive, but between my head and my heart (and other parts of my body) the message always got truncated (my big word for the day).

Only recently has it hit me that this, God's rebuking/disciplining love comes out of a deep, deep well of healing and restoration. A never ending love, stubborn, jealous love. But not jealous like someone in a codependent relationship that asks for everything and offers nothing.

On the contrary, it is a jealous love that is Jealous for our best. Jealous for all that would cause us to know what abundant life truly is. Jealous because it knows that we have traded true love, for something ugly, something that has bound our very souls in so many ways and places that we actually believe the darkness is bright. It's from this heart that God's love is extended to us.

Yes, it can get uncomfortable and even hurt for a time, but it only hurts because we've stepped so far away from true love we don't recognize it easily. What feels like pain is actually Jesus breaking through and ripping out the chains that had kept us in bondage for so long.

Here's the point, our part in the process is just to surrender...to let him love us. Often we short circuit the process, by trying to show God that we really are loveable in what we do & say. But the shortest route to knowing this love is not through our doing, but through surrender. To bask in it. To allow it to touch us wherever it wills, accept it, and live in the newness of that light. It is here we can KNOW (experience) the depth and width of the only love that nothing can separate us from. God's stubborn, never ending and jealous love.

Listening to God is hard

Ok, maybe listening to God, in truth is not hard. But when you've had years of formats for how you approach and listen to him...or formulas for accessing God etc...I'm only exaggerating a little...it seems hard. As of late in my reading and just in everyday heart I've been trying to live out what it means to seek first the kingdom of God & especially just to listen. To spend a little more time in solitude and just opening myself to as well as waiting on God. I confess I'm often walking away feeling like there's more. Still, I wait. I confess, I'm the kind of person that wants the quick answer. That wants to hear yesterday. I hate to wait. Still, God's taught me through some not so easy lessons that waiting is a prerequisite for growth, maturity, and the faith that changes life. And so, again, I choose to wait.

Whose Words?

Over the last week or so, i've spent some time reading Ezekiel. Two days ago it hit me. One of God's condemnations on "so called" prophets rang loud and clear.

"O people of Israel, these prophets of yours are like jackals digging around in the ruins...they have lied and said, 'My message is from the Lord,' even though the Lord never sent them. And yet they expect him to fulfill their prophecies! Can your messages be anything but false if you claim, 'This message is from the Lord,' when I have not even spoken to you?"

God gets pretty seriously angry over the course of several chapters at people saying...I have heard from God and this is what he says, this is what he will do, this is what he wants...when God had never spoken.

And then it hit home...man, I don't want to speak anything, no matter how right it sounds without hearing. I want to not just believe what I say, to not just be biblically sound in what I say. I want to hear! I want the Spirit to lead, guide and speak. I would rather he shut me up, than to speak words that he hasn't spoken.

James Mcdonald Unplugged

We had several q&a sessions with James Mcdonald this weekend. At one point someone asked James how he felt about the culture and the church and their relationship into the future. Now, you have to understand that James doesn't think much of the cultural thing. As far as he thinks the whole Postmodern thing is just talk and it'll disappear. But responding to the question that I can't remember exactly he responded...
"We have our heads so far up the culture's butt..."
I forget the rest of the comment. It was far less memorable than the initial part. This is tongue-in-cheek, but I find it funny that pastor's in the emergent church are often criticized for using profanity. While those that would speak against it, find creative, political correct ways to be profane. Someone has said that a rose by any other name is still a rose. My question is what's the difference between saying butt & ass. I think he has an aversion to it, even when referring to an insult, he mentioned that someone, angry at him, called him a "donkey". I wonder what they really called him.

Anyway, please don't read anything into this post...I just found it funny and it generated lots of laughter and talk during the conference.

worth investing your life in?

A statement in Wilsonian's response to the last post..."This is not worth the investment of my life." (read her response) has caused me to think further on the topic...

I think a lot of people are coming to this conclusion, church as they've known/experienced it "is not worth the investment of my life" and I think that's one of the greatest reasons that people care less and less about involvement in church - especially when and if that means just keeping a few programs going for Christians...in the past many did it out of obligation or guilt or just because they thought that was the extent of the Christian life, but it never led to the "abundant" life Jesus promised - so they're giving up. Sometimes unsure if they're right or wrong - often listening to judgement from others who are sure they're wrong. Still, I don't believe these people are giving up on the big "C" church - they're not giving up on Christ - what they long for is the opportunity to invest their lives in something worth investing - something worth dying to, something worth really living for. And when it happens they surrender - wholeheartedly.

One of the funny (actually, not funny at all) things I find lately is the critcism and judgement that goes on from individuals or group of Christians to Christians against any church/church leader that begins to help their congregation get this. The problem, seemingly, is that they either don't cross all their t's or dot their i's the same way so they're sacrificed on the altar of my orthodoxy ('cause after all, I'm right and everyone else is wrong - Oh, I say that's not true, but at the end of the day I can't think of anything that I'm possibly wrong in, therefore I must be right) - we've even learned to criticize, judge, and outright slander nicely - okay some haven't, some just go for the jugular - I don't know which is worst...

All this brings me to a moment in Jesus' life that doesn't get much attention, and I find interesting it's even mentioned, except it's so real to our experience...I remember Jesus' disciples up in arms because there were other people doing ministry in Jesus' name besides them - people who weren't part of their group, people who were probably doing things just a little different than they were...in the disciples eyes, they were the called out ones, they were the ones Jesus invited to follow him, and these other people, whoever they were - they were not in the in group, and that being the case - just had to be stopped.

Jesus' words to them - (here goes my version)

...why don't you just focus on what I've called you to? Why must you be constantly worried about everyone else, including each other, and how their minister? Are you their master? You were called, and they were called, neither is greater than the other...so stop pointing fingers and judging and do what you were called to do.

We're still so worried about how we look, what others think, still so focused on issues of living, but the point remains the same; people that are alive cannot go to the places Jesus said only dead people can follow him to. The places where true life - the abundant life is found.

think about it

Found this at desert pastor

"In Christ there is no emergent or institutional, no liberal or conservative, no progressive or fundamentalist, but Christ is all, and is in all." "One of you says, 'I follow Len Sweet,' another, 'I follow Rick Warren'; one says, 'I follow Brian McLaren," another, "I follow Chuck Colson.' Is Christ divided? Was Brian McLaren crucified for you? Were you baptized into the name of Rick Warren? Are you not acting like mere men? What, after all, is Brian McLaren? And what is Rick Warren? Only servants, through whom you came to believe--as the Lord assigned each to his task. The institutional church planted the seed, the emerging church watered it, but God made it grow. So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God, who makes things grow. The one who plants and the one who waters have one purpose, and each will be rewarded according to his own labor."

I like that!

Footnote to all prayers

A footnote to all prayers is a poem by C.S. Lewis regarding prayer and how our prayer in reality misses the mark of who God is because it is wrapped up in who we think God - and ultimately, what we think God is, is usually off...but God takes those prayers, however off they may be and draws them to who he really is. You might have to read it a few times (I did), it's worth it...

Footnote to All Prayers

He whom I bow to only knows to whom I bow
When I attempt the ineffable Name, murmuring Thou,
And dream of Pheidian fancies and embrace in heart
Symbols (I know) which cannot be the thing Thou art.
Thus always, taken at their word, all prayers blaspheme
Worshipping with frail images a folk-lore dream,
And all men in their praying, self-deceived, address
The coinage of their own unquiet thoughts, unless
Thou in magnetic mercy to Thyself divert
Our arrows, aimed unskilfully, beyond desert;
And all men are idolators, crying unheard
To a deaf idol, if Thou take them at their word.

Take not, O Lord, our literal sense. Lord, in thy great
Unbroken speech our limping metaphor translate.

Note: Phaedius was a classical Greek sculptor famous for his majestic sculptures of the gods.

Holiness

John over at "Skywalking" posted about holiness and his post got me thinking...

When it comes to holiness, as an individual, but even more so as a pastor, if that makes any sense, this is what's going through my mind...

To be holy & complete is to be set aside and grow to maturity for the sake of living out Christ's mission (being missional)...to seek and save that which is lost, to go after the one lost sheep, to make disciples of all peoples, tribes and nations.

It is not to become "ready" for the eternal worship service in the sky.

So many us seem to see everything spiritual as having only one end...eternal life. Jesus died so that you and I could go to heaven. That's a wonderful part of our hope, for sure, but in so doing, there's a chance to miss one of Jesus' most precious themes..."May God's Kingdom be on Earth as it is in heaven!"...."All creation groans waiting for redemption" Here's the question, Is that a false hope? Or does Jesus want Heaven on earth and creation redeemed? (I know it was Paul who said the latter)

How is it that that never made it into our theology? Oh yes, the eternal service in the sky...The danger with that is that we can get caught up getting ready for something that might not happen for another ten thousand years, and miss the opportunities in our lifetime, today, to make things here, as they are in heaven.

Be Missional!

The difference between Christianity as we know it, and missional Christianity (Brian Mclaren - "A Generous Orthodoxy").

Many of us are frustrated with a "Jesus and Me" Christianity. The kind that fosters a "my rights and my immediate needs are God's main concern." You can't read the Bible and accept that (okay, you can, but you'll be wrong - how's that for non-tolerant) Okay, what's the alternative?. Biblical Christianity, right? That's what McLaren calls a Missional Christianity...here's how he explains it...

This is Christianity as we know it or experience it in most established churches...

"...my largest concern is me, my soul, my personal destiny in heaven, my maturity, and my rewards. Occasionally, after 'winning' people based of personal self-interest, churches can entice people to care a little about the church-but is it any surprise that people 'won to Christ' by self-interest come to the church asking, 'What's in it for me?'" - McLaren

The alternative - A Missional approach...

"In the diagram to the right, Jesus comes with saving love for the world. He creates the church as a missional community to join him in his mission of saving the world. And He invites me to be a part of this missional community to experience his saving love and participate in it." - McLaren

Chances are that if you just looked at those and said, yeah, so, what? It probably hasn't hit you how different the two are.

For example, as McLaren writes....

"it eliminates; dichotomies like 'evangelism' and 'social action' - both are integrated in expressing love for the world.... Eliminates distinctions like ministry (in the church) and mission (out of it) - since mministry is for mission or in other words every Christian is a missionary and every place is the mission field."

This is all from the chapter - "Why I'm a Missional Christian?"And it gets better...talking about how it opens up a third alternative beyond exclusive and universalist religion (that had to get your attention!). However, that's a whole other post - or you could just get your own book. A Generous Orthodoxy (see left colunm).

This is definitely a read and re-read deal.

True religion...

Scott's prayer for us today...

May God bless you with discomfort at easy answers, half truths, superficial relationships, so that you will live deep within your heart.

May God bless you with anger at injustice, oppression and exploitation of people so that you will work for justice, equality and peace.

May God bless you with tears to shed for those who suffer from pain, rejection, starvation and war, so that you will reach out your hand to comfort them and change their pain into joy.

And may God bless you with the foolishness to think that you can make a difference in the world, so that you will do the things which others tell you cannot be done.

May this truly be my/our heart not just for today, but every day.

A tired world...

From Love Beyond Reason...

"The world is tired of Christians who proclaim that they know the right beliefs and are committed to the right values, but in whom there is no grace."

May grace drive our actions, our thoughs, our motives....

How much do we love God II

Last week I came accross a post that led me to post on this...this is a follow up post.

Originally the quote that got my attention was this...

"I will love God only as much as I love the person I dislike the most." ~"Prayer: Conversing with God" by Rosalind Rinker

I liked this quote because it reminded me of John's words that tell us if we say we love God but don't love our brothers/sisters, we are liars...

Why was this particularly important these past few weeks? Well it's simple. In the next two months we will be celebrating the second aniversary since my grandmother's death. My grandmother died of cancer and during the period that led to her death our family fell apart. No, not at the fact that we were losing someone we all loved...but because of money. As the person that was asked to handle those details, as well as funeral arrangements. etc...I heard words that you never expect to hear from people whom you grew up with, people whom you loved all your life.

It's been almost two years since I'd heard from them. I've missed them deeply although there was no room to talk. I've loved them deely, even though some of these same people are responsible for the abuse that I suffered early on in my life.

This was the opportunity. The opportunity to walk away and leave it all behind. With one exception. The truth is, and you can disagree with me...but in my heart I know...I only love God as much as I'm able to love them. I'm called to forgive them as I was forgiven while I was still a sinner.

Last Sunday I was invited to a lunch. A lunch where most of us would be together since my grandmothers funeral service I conducted. And so we went. And so we met. We didn't talk about the past. We just talked. We didn't deal with the pain, we just got together. We didn't try to fix anything...we just spend a few hours together.

I had the opportunity to hug Debbie, my cousin whom I love and miss deeply and tell her I loved her. I didn't plan to say it, but I just missed her so much I couldn't help it and so we held each other and just kept repeating those words to one another. The sad part, she's just a kid, she wasn't part of all the stuff that happened, she was just a victim of the results.

As for the rest of the family...the pain is still too much for some. And so they weren't there. But I'm glad that I went. I'm glad because the door as been opened once again. And once again we can grow together. And once again, Jesus can shine in our relationship. And maybe, just maybe they'll discover his deep, gracious, and forgiving love...in my love. Even when at times the barrage of angry words comes sweeping back to my mind and they still hurt. But I'm learning to let go when they come and remember...Jesus loves them.

And so, I believe...truly....I can only love God as much as I love the person I like the least.

The point...as a Christian I have to imitate My master who did something about loving someone who at one time was unlovable. He took the initiative and he won my heart. And he calls me to do the same thing...those people who you like the least...take the initiative, show them what grace and unconditional love is and as you do...introduce them into the author of love.

We love, because God first loved us!

God's will and all that...

Is it something we're supposed to spend so much of the time trying to figure out...(ie. what is it? am I in it? am I out of it?)

Here's my point, I think we spend too much time trying to figure this out and even worrying whether we're in God's will or not...and too little time just being faithful, regardless of the circumstances we find ourselves in.

At a recent conference (Catalyst) Andy Stanley didn't speak directly to this but what he had to say completely applied. And using Joseph's life OT, he came to a conclusion after asking the following question.

Why did Joseph act the way that he did regardless of the circumstances he found himself in?

Over and over in his life the circumstances were rather tragic and painful for him, yet through it all we read the words, "God was with him". But that didn't mean that Joseph was aware of it through special dreams and revelations. On the contrary, God would seem to be pretty absent from his life considering the course of the journey (I know we know the ending and so we almost forget the journey.) But during those 15-20 years of the journey... God was with him and his brothers thought of killing him. God was with him and he was sold him into slavery. God was with him and so God blessed Potiphar. God was with him and he came upon a lose, lose situation with Potiphar's wife (sleeps with her, gets killed/doesn't and goes to jail) God was with him and he gets in tight with the prison warden (uh?-not a real wow moment). God was with him and he interprets two dreams only to be forgotten in jail for another two years. God was with him and Pharaoh (who sees himself as God) calls him to see whether he'll really be able to interpret his dreams - we know the rest of the story...but do you see the journey?

In the journey the fact that God was with Joseph was often followed by hardship or God blessing others because of him, rather than God blessing him directly. Some of you will argue that being in with the warden was God blessing him (ok, have it your way)

Here's the point, why did Joseph act the way he did, regardless of his circumstances? According to Stanley, and I believe he's right on the money, the answer is simple.

Joseph did what anyone who was sold into slavery, framed for rape, thrown and forgotten in jail, what anyone who was brought before the ruler of the world would do if they absolutely believed that God was with them.

In that manner, the most important thing isn't trying to figure what God's will is for your life, the most important thing is to live today believing that God is with you. And whatever may come even if you can't figure it out, even if it feels there should be a better, more comfortable place you could/should be in...the truth is there could be no better place of safety - for the truth is God is with you.

As I read just this week, it's this kind of trust, this kind of an understanding of who God is that would allow Jesus to sleep through a storm when everyone else was thinking they were going to die. It's this kind of belief that had Daniel walk into a lion's den, and other's into fiery furnaces and still others to allow themselves to be sawed in half.

When you truly believe that God loves you and that he's close to you, regardless of whether you "feel" him or even if you haven't heard from him, it's then you discover that whatever your circumstances and wherever you are in this world - it's a perfectly safe place to be.

A wonderful lesson that began at Catalyst and has kept evolving since then.

How much do we love God?

While spending some time quickly browsing at the Portal, last week, I came across a statement that has been coming back to my mind over and over again for about a week. When something does that, I start paying attention.

Here it is...

"I will love God only as much as I love the person I dislike the most."

~"Prayer: Conversing with God" by Rosalind Rinker

I read that quote and was reminded of the apostle John's words...

"We love because He first loved us. If anyone says, 'I love God,' yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen. And He has given us this command: Whoever loves God must also love his brother."

How much more do I need to love the people around me? Especially those I've felt I've had a right to dislike for whatever justifiable reason in my own mind.

Unbelievable, yet awesome...

Last Night Vun and I went out to 7:22. A Ministry put on by North Point Community Church for college & carreer/young adults/singles I'm not sure what the demographic is...anyway, not the point.

Last night I attended my first ever silent service. 2 hours without one spoken word. You got it, not one spoken word. Several thousand people in one room and not one spoken word. Worship in silence.

We examined the issue of "life interruptions" we evaluated our own lives' interrumptions, we considered our interruption from the light of scripture, what God might be doing in us, to us and even through us. Before we were done we were able to lay whatever interruption in our lives (present or past) before God and his care. And then all of us shared in communion together.

And we did all that in absolute and complete silence. An interruption to look deeper at our interruptions.

It was an incredible experience.

the journey

today Vun and I begin a new journey even amidst our present journey.

It's a journey of going to a different king of church that is focused on an emergent lifestyle. (whatever that means)

We go blind. But we go longing for something else in our life. At six pm this evening we'll take part in a service that no doubt will be quite different than what we're used to, yet, one that I wouldn't be surprised if it resonated with my soul.

I'll let you know how it goes...

Personal life lately...

Lately I've been listening to the Bible on Cd. It's what I do on my way in to church in the morning - traffic is usually slow so it gives me a good chunk of time just to listen.

Over the last month or saw I've been in the Kings-Nehemiah. The lesson I'm learning most of all. Heart stuff. It's not even so much about what you do - take David for example - as much as it is about heart. However, what you do will have definite consequences - so don't just dismiss that.

One statement sticks out after many weeks..."He sought God, worked hard and God blessed him." So there's something to be said for what you do - okay, that was a tangent...

Personally, the thing that's touched me the most over the last month or so is the need for humility - not easy when you've always thought of yourself as higher than you ough. I desire it so bad - I find myself praying for it every day as I begin my day, and then I catch myself throughout the day saying this or that, that might just puff me up a bit or exalt myself in the eyes of others. That which I want to do I don't do. Still I pray to that end, and will seek that each day.

The other thing that I've been impacted by has been Solomon's life. It's hard, in our society, not to be led, even in small ways, by the desire to accumulate and possess stuff. I've know what it is to be poor and not have enough money to even be able to provide for a place to live. But those aren't my circumstances these days. I look at my life and although there's much we don't have and can't have, I consider myself rich in every sense of the word. And often I find myself drawn to buy this or that - stuff - things I don't really need - but get because I can afford them. And then I read/hear about Solomon - he only asked God for two things - Wisdom & Knowlege. That's it. He didn't ask to be rich or for stuff, just wisdom and knowlege.

Like the Humility thing, I'm praying lots about Wisdom & Knowlege these days.

It's neat to see some of the things that is resulting in. It's neat to see the awareness it's bringing into my life of several areas where I wasn't even aware that God really hadn't had control over. It's not so neat to see when handing over control isn't my always easy or my first desire. The mountain top is still far away in the distance.

Thank God for his "STEADFAST" love & grace. Otherwise, I'd be sunk and without hope.

From my reading

"When Jesus explained spirituality rightly understood, people left everything: they gave up their possession, sacrificed their careers, renounced past behaviour and sin, accepted persecution and suffering, and they did it with joy. They did it laughing and weeping and high-fiving and dancing, because they were convinced that here at last was the pearl of great price, this was the winning lottery ticket, this at long last was it. Jesus was it."

Love Beyond Reason - John Ortberg

What will it take for this to be true in me? This is what I long for, for me and for those I serve.

a sad day it is...

After my last post I found out from Darryl that a pastor acquaintance of ours just had an affair.

My heart broke! His family, the church, himself - so much brokeness.

As I mentioned at Darryl's site, recently I heard a pastor mention that when we struggle with sin, God will always try to deal with us privately first (often for quite a long time in his patience), but if we don't listen we must be ready - God's after reconcilliation and he'll do whatever it takes to get us there, even if it means our shame for a little while.

Every time I hear news like this, and I've seen this happen in people I know far too often in my short life. My heart breaks. Not because I'm better, not because I don't understand how it could happen, how they could do something like this, but because I know my heart. I know it's tendencies. I know all the time that sin is right there just waiting, trying to sneak in, to get a foothold, an advantage. I know it could be me.

May God bring healing to his life, the life of his family, the life of the church.

Looking for real people...

The journey isn't easy. It's not one you can take alone. Alone you fall and have no one to help you up - no one to encourage you to step out when you're scared, when you've failed so many times before. For this reason, the scriptures say, "Two are better than one".

Interestingly enough this is not easy to find. It's not easy to find people who are willing to be completely honest about where they are, and it's not easy to find people who will be the other who will listen, keep you accountable and say - this is who I am and where I'm at.

Over the years I've found that most of us are looking for this. A place, people with whom we could let it all down and truly be accepted, while being encouraged onward to victory. But something often holds us back, "Fear". Fear that if I open up my life - I won't be accepted. Fear that I'll be judged. Fear that all this love talk is just that - lots of talk.

Jesus painted a picture, spoke of, and showed us a Kingdom where this wasn't just talk - so why is it so hard to find? I'm a sinner! I'm a man whose heart longs to please God but that when left to myself alone, I struggle and fall. That doesn't surprise me though, the Scriptures say that we are to confess our sins to one another, why, because God knows that alone we're easy targets for sin, our flesh, Satan and his powers. As one of my best friends use to put it..."Alone it's easy to cheat on God."

We've built a faith philosophy that is based on just "Jesus and Me." An individualistic faith. But Jesus pointed us to a Kingdom where we would need others in order to live out the calling we have received as his followers.

I can't do it alone! Alone I stumble and fall all over the place. For years I've tried to make sure there's people in my life who know it all - my temptations, my falls - and better who challenge me and encourage me so that as I grow experience victory in Christ! I haven't always succeeded. Most people don't really want to deal with the fact that their pastor struggles and falls. It's ok to talk about it, say it generally, be vulnerable - but don't get specific...

I've felt somewhat alone in this area for some time- last week I called up an old friend. Someone who I knew wouldn't be scared off by my call - we spent an afternoon together and covenanted to being there for each other - to challenging and asking the tough questions of each other. You don't know you miss something until you go without it for a while...

It's nice knowing that there's someone out there who's not afraid to be real and who I can be completely real with, who's praying, who's really being what Jesus said we should be to one another. I feel priviliged!

I wish this happed more often in the church.

Small Groups in my cabeça

Cabeça means head in Portuguese. (Don't say I never taught you anything.)

Tonight our whole small group team meets to talk, you guessed it, small groups.

This is the third season of small groups at Richview, since our Taskforce first got together three summers ago to discuss implementing SG's at Richview. Since then we have trained leaders. We have had some successes, some failures. We have gained some leaders and lost some leaders. We have seen relationship and spiritual growth take place. And we've seen people gather just because they were supposed to be somewhere on whatever night it was their group was meeting. But overall we've kept moving forward. Everything hasn't been perfect for a number of reasons, but God has been gracious. This season promises to be exciting, it looks (knock on wood) that I might have a little more quality time to devote to the effort and there's almost a buzz in the air. The next few months should be fun (and busy as can be) as we plan for our start-up in October.

With the excitement comes the danger. This is where we could really mess it up. To fail this season is to potentially do some potentially irrepairable damage. Also some new challenges will take us to another level of what it means for us to do small groups in our setting. Most of all I'm longing for faithfulness, both from me and my leaders. A true commitment to shepherd their flock. To "feed their sheep" because they love Jesus and for no other reason at all.

I'm looking forward to tonight's dialogue!

Small Groups in my cabeça..

Cabeça is head in Portuguese. (Don't say I never taught you anything.)

Tonight our whole small group team meets to talk, you guessed it, small groups.

This is the third season of small groups at Richview, since our Taskforce first got together three summers ago to discuss implementing SG's at Richview. Since then we have trained leaders. We have had some successes, some failures. We have gained some leaders and lost some leaders. We have seen relationship and spiritual growth take place. And we've seen people gather just because they were supposed to be somewhere on whatever night it was their group was meeting. But overall we've kept moving forward. Everything hasn't been perfect for a number of reasons, but God has been gracious. This season promises to be exciting, it looks (knock on wood) that I might have a little more quality time to devote to the effort and there's almost a buzz in the air. The next few months should be fun (and busy as can be) as we plan for our start-up in October.

With the excitement comes the danger. This is where we could really mess it up. To fail this season is to potentially do some potentially irrepairable damage. Also some new challenges will take us to another level of what it means for us to do small groups in our setting. Most of all I'm longing for faithfulness, both from me and my leaders. A true commitment to shepherd their flock. To "feed their sheep" because they love Jesus and for no other reason at all.

I'm looking forward to tonight's dialogue!

The Lord of the second chance

"If you're going to receive help from the Lord of the second chance, you too will have to acknowlege your condition."

John Ortberg - Love beyond Reason

Pretense. Masks. We're all afraid. Afraid to be real. Afraid to stand up and say this is who I really am. I'm worthy not because there's much of me that's worthy, if anything at all, but because Jesus is worthy and he's pursued me, captured me and wrapped me in his arms. But before you can go further, you have to acknowlege the pretense, the masks, the lies, all those things that make us think of ourselves more highly than we should. There but for the grace of God go I! And oh, what sweet and wonderful grace! Grace that has separated me from my sin. Grace to face all that comes my way today. And Finally, Grace for all my tomorrows. No need to worry. No need to be anxious. He is all I need!

Pursued! Captured! Safe in His arms!

On love...

To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket - safe, dark, motionless, airless - it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemalbe. The alternative to tragedy, or at least to the risk of tragedy, is damnation. The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perterbations of love is Hell. CS LEWIS

found this interesting reading Love beyond reason by John Ortberg.

Cecilia's Parents turn to God...

I just found out yesterday, but Cecilia's parents have become Christians. You can read about in an article in the Globe and Mail.

I'm glad that the family has found a place for support but more importantly that they've come into a relationship with God. There seems to be a struggle that this new family they've come into is taking "all their time" - I think it's probably more of they need the support and this community is there, helping them work through the issues etc. Of course those of differing worldviews would see it in other ways...this discussion forum, babble, has a lot to say about this, interesting to be aware how Christian intervention is looked at.

A journey that started with a little girls question. "Mommy, do you believe in God?"

Once again, thanks Cecilia & thank you Lord that you work in many ways, even through pain and what seems like hopelessness.

Spiritual Formation - Week II

As we continue our study on Spiritual Formation we have come to "Spiritual Formation through Physicality", or the physical in spiritual formation. Simply put, the Western faith, after the enlightenment, became wrapped up with the mind and the soul, to the exclusion of the physical. This screams in the face of the Old Testament's call and Jesus restatement that we are to love God with all our hearts, souls, mind and strength (physical).

In neglecting the physical we have run away from ways of experiencing God that he himself created, the arts, the senses, postures and more. But by lowering the importance of the physical, or making it somehow not part of our spirituality, it has led to the neglect of our bodies which is most evident in the western world in obesity - homosexuality is wrong, but gluttony is ok, it must be since we don't address it very much. The point here isn't about obesity as it is about realizing that because our bodies (physical) are the temple of the Holy Spirit (mystery) they, just like the mind and the spirit are a means to both blessing God as well as experiencing Him.

So, my brothers and sisters, exercise before the Lord, rest before the Lord, taste before the Lord, feel, smell, watch, listen and yes, dance before him as well. Use your bodies and all your physicality to bless him, experience him, and walk
deeper with our God.

I've often wondered, if Paul tells us that physical world alone is enough to show us who God is, his nature etc...and even speak against us should we not accept it's testimony, if it's enough to condemn us - is it then not also by default enough to draw men and women to Him should they accept it's testimony?

My Initial thoughts...

Us pastors around here are working through the book "Reimagining Spiritual Formation - by Doug Pagitt"

I'm thoroughly enjoying it...the things that have struck me thus far and no, I'm not going to explain them...

Some thoughts on Holistic spiritual Formation

1. Knowledge based spiritual formation failed.
2. The Gospel is a call to Kingdom living - Jesus' call to a better way of life that is meant to begin now and follow through into eternity. (Mark 1:15)
3. Christian community is more than about us right here, right now...it's local, it's global, it's historical and it's futurical.
4. We are called to Kingdom living NOW!
-this does not mean accountability, I live it/you live it - we make sure the other is living it. It's about vulnerability - We live it together! Help each other, encourage, build up, rebuke, etc.

That's just the first chapter - great stuff to munch on!

I'll make you...

Jesus looks at people like you and me and he gives an invitation. "Come, follow me and I'll make you..."

Ultimately he offers us a choice, you can either follow me or not follow me. However, if you decide to follow, you can know one thing for certain, he'll make you into whatever he sees in you. Or more accurately, what he's always known, even from the beginning of time, you should and you need to be.

It's simple really, he looks at us and says, "I know who you are." I know everything there is to know about you, nothing is hidden. Even the stuff we keep hidden from everyone else. He sees it all. And yet, when he looks whithin, although he sees every dark corner - there's something he's more interested in, the potential - and because he can bring that potential out to it's full measure, he says - "if you'll follow, I'll make you!"

Our part is to follow, to learn, to imitate - knowing as we do, as we listen, as we obey, and even as we disobey - he is making us and he will make us into the one that as C.S. Lewis says, "if we were to look upon today, we might either be completely scared off by or inclined to worship" (my paraphrase).

The point is this...there is no other way to get there. The fact that we're depraved doesn't mean so much that we're as bad as we could be, but it certainly means that we can never be as good as we should be - and that my friends is a sentence that says you cannot make yourself what you should/need to be - it's only in following him that we can begin to discover what he will make us into. And that, my friends, even as he's making you, you only see through darkened glasses.

But this we know, the Master will make us just like he is.

coming to an end...

Well, here we are at Pastor's conference at 11:20pm. Hard to believe that three days have gone by, but one more session (but the book is finished- we bought it, and therefore, we might miss the last session), breakfast, and we go home.

It's been a good time - gotten to know that Matt believes that all women should stay in quiet reverence in church. He claim to never have said any such thing, but who are you going to believe.

Just having a late night laugh before we go to sleep.

Humm...

Ok, this is neither a new insight nor a new learning, however I thought Stuart Briscoe made this very clear when speaking on the feeding of the five thousand and following stories...

"Human resourses, however limited, willingly offered, divinely empowered are more than adequate to achieve divine results."

And a quick definition of a discipe....

"a disciple must be a follower, a learner and an imitator"

The things that stood out for me yesterday...

You've been waiting...

I'd mentioned that we were doing a new series "Lies we've believed" at the church and that "O" was doing some sketches for the series. Well, here's his first sketch. Sorry the sermon isn't posted yet.

UPDATE: Here's the sermon...

Enjoy!

I don't want to go to heaven II

As I mentioned two days ago, Lucas and I talked about heaven and dying and hell, and Jesus, and are there computers in heaven....

Well, later on that night, when Vun and I put him to bed, Lucas still wanted to continue the topic.

So we did, According to many people I could exclaim that Lucas made a decision for Christ that night. I don't know about that - and have not written that date down in his album or anything, maybe I should, but by the end of our conversation, without pushing and manipulating - Lucas turned to me and said, "You know what dad, I wand to do what Jesus wants." I thought that was pretty cool. Is that his way of saying I want to follow Jesus? I know Lucas pretty well, and I know his understanding about this is really, really limited.
Never the less, it was a good conversation!

More than that - Lucas has been clean - no stealing (ANYTHING) for two and a half weeks, for those of you who have heard all my woes on this - it's also worth saying Lucas - Good Job Buddy!

What have we done - one of the things that I did was keep it front and centre. Everyday we remind him not to steal etc. The other thing is, if he doesn't steal, on Fridays he gets the computer back for the day, but that's it. Well, for the first time in a long time, it feels like there's something that's working. Each day he counts down how many sleeps he has left to go to getting the computer. And each time, I guess, it reminds him that if he steals he'll ruin that. I'm not sure what's going through his head, but I do know one thing, regardless of how long it lasts, he's learning that he can do it.

We will continue to do this for the rest of the summer.

Wrap-up: It's cool to be a father and have a son at this age (5, him that is). There's so many cool conversations and fun things to do and discuss. It's awesome. I pray I live up to this calling I've received.

On Becoming

Some words from "Uprising" by Erwin McMannus.

"What do you do when the very thing that's suffocating you is the person you've become? What do you do when you can't stand the sight of yourself?...And then it hits you. There is a way out!...You can become someone else. You can leave behind the person you've grown to despise and become a person that even you can admire...This requires no one less than Jesus Christ. He sets you free through the power of change. His is the gift of transformation...Your character will reflect the very character of God. What will you look like? Only God really knows, but it will be like no one else, unique in the person God created you to be.

I've just begun to read....

Organic Discipleship II

Turns out I'm having this discussion over at Darryl's site, but I want to continue it here since it's where I started it...

I ended the last post by asking, if what we have termed as "spiritual disciplines" are not the best way to "measure" how spiritual someone is, what's better?

These are really not my words or thoughts, but I remember Jesus saying that his followers would be known by their theology (sorry, honest mistake), no, his followers were to be known by their disciplines (oops, sorry again). Let me try again, Jesus said that his followers would be known by their fruit. Uh? Fruit. Oh, you mean how many people they save right? No, tha's us reading into the text again.

Paul comes along and says eh guys, you should know this already but here's what the fruit of the Spirit is; love, joy, peace.....and self-control.

Two points, I don't believe Paul was trying to give us an exhaustive list here. Read the Gospels and you'll find some more. What was it that Jesus said, you are my followers if you "do what I command." And I command you to LOVE ONE ANOTHER AS I HAVE LOVED YOU!!!!!!

Wrapping it up, true spirituality is messy. It's not neat like an ever climbing graph. It's all over the place. Forward, back, upside down and everywhere else.

However, if churches are truly going to measure spiritual growth the focus needs to change from how many verses have you memorized to what kind of fruit are you bearing? And in order for this to happen, we need to rediscover community (I'm not just talking small groups) but true Christian community. People doing spirituality together; knowing each other, challenging each other, encouraging each other...helping each other.

Finally...it's not about measuring in the sense of how far you've gotten as much as it is about are you "going" and you "on track" are you "following" him. And if certain disciplines help you to do that, wonderful, but if they don't - THROW THEM OUT WITH THE DISH WATER.

Organic Discipleship I

You've heard me mention wanting to write some on this in recent e-mails....

Here's a test - what would it look like if all the Christians around you practiced the following disciplines faithfully - what would you say abou their spirituality?

1. Careful students of the scriptures 2. Zealous and active in their stand for God 3. Desire for worship and prayer 4. Consistent in worship attendance 5. Practice scripture memorization 6. Not afraid to pray in public 7. Active in the local church 8. Fast regularly 9. Desire to stand against ungodliness 10. Firm grasp of basic, foundational theology.

So what do you think? What would this say about the level of spirituality if Christians did this faithfully.

Here's my point, maybe something, maybe nothing. All these things done from the heart say that someone is growing. All of them done out of obligation have absolutely no spiritual value.

Why talk about this? Well, often these and maybe a few more qualities, have been what we have used to measure spirituality, only problem, in and of themselves they could be good tools, but not good measurements of spirituality.

Let me wrap this post by saying...Few of us could do these things more faithfully than the Pharisees did. These things were part of their daily diet. So, if this is the measurement of spirituality, as we so often make it out to be in the church, they were super spiritual.

So, what's better? More on a later post...
Thanks to Vince B. @ Westwinds community Church for helping to put into perspective what I've been thinking about.

Several months since my last sermon

I preached this morning. I really struggled with this one. If you're wondering why, take a look at the passage, Genesis 9:18-10:38. But God's really been working me over with the passage and I believe he took me somewhere that honored his story then and now, even more than just preaching a sermon faithful to the text. "Whatever that means." Anyway, I'd been struggling with this for a long time. I'd had it finished early this week, yet, at 2:00am last night I found myself going over it and changing it. I've stopped asking myself questions like was it good or not? I'm realizing that's not the point. I really pray God uses it, even inspite of me. Having said all that, you can followthe sermon link to it - if you're interested, if not, that's fine to.

Easter Season

The Easter season. This week's and leading up to it has been all about making sure that something significant happens at Richview for Good Friday and Easter. Making sure that for the people who come, they are able to find a setting, even an experience that will not only show them who Jesus is, but even draw them closer to him. As the person putting the orders of service together, there's something pretty neat when you begin to see something together that hopefully allows the room for that to possibly take place in people's lives.

Only one problem, I'm not sure I experience the time leading up to this season or these days in the way that maybe would help me experience God in the same way I could (should? I wonder about that too). I've heard myself say over and over this week, "I can't wait 'till this weekend is done!".

As I lie here stuffy, sniffling, and not quite coherent, I'm wondering if I'm missing something. I don't like to make a big deal about seasons, the days aren't any more special than any other days, and so, often, I react negatively during these times. But there's something about remembering what Jesus has done and who he is and I want to make make sure I don't miss doing that?

Maybe, I just need to find another time to focus on this outside of all this commotion. Maybe celebrate the easter season at another time in the year. Maybe it would be more significant to think about it a little every week and find a way to respond.

know or no grace?

I once read about two Christians, famous to all our ears, only I don't remember their names. Anyway, that's not the point. The point is this, both of them are renown in the Christian world, wrote a whole bunch, often quoted.

But there is one difference between the two. One followed Christ and walked in grace and not just understood, but lived in the undestanding that all his sins were forgiven. The other understood grace, but lived with past regrets, and was never quite able to get beyond the things he'd done. Never being able to accept God's grace to a point where it really brought him freedom where it matters, the freedom that quiets the voices that try to bring judgement to our lives, even though, in Christ there is no condemnation any longer. Don't get me wrong, I believe both were Christians, both have met their saviour, but their lives were different because of how they lived or didn't live under grace.

So, which are you? Do you know your sins are forgiven but still can't get away from the voices that try to condemn and bring judgement? Or do you genuinely walk in a freedom that understands that in Christ there is no condemnation, no more judgement? That his stripes have brought healing, that he bore your judgement so you would not be judged for sin anymore?

Have you heard the voice that says,

"has no one judged you? then neither do I."

I must confess, in my life, I'm a bit of both those men. What I know in my head, doesn't always translate to the truth I feel or experience in my heart. Then I know people like my wife, who just live in grace. People who not just know they are forgiven. But for whom being in "in Christ" means that sin is gone, truly "forgotten, removed as far as the east is from the west."

Although I know that in my head, although I know it's absolutely true, I look forward to a day where I can experience it in the same manner as people like my wife do.

Just some thoughts on grace...

I confess...

I confess, although I'm a pastor, sometimes I have questions that take me to the brink of what some would call heresy.

I know the right answers to my questions, or should I say, the answers I'm supposed to know. At times I think they are good answers too, at other times I feel like my answers, the ones I was taught, and the ones I've come to myself, don't quite get it all. I have answered all of them to one or more people at different times. I have even preached about them and yes, most of the time I believe them, really I do. Yet, every once in a while, late at night, or in my reading, or more study, they come back to my mind and make me think some more, usually these are growing experiences, but the starting point is not always clear or easy.

Here's one I'm dealing with lately. Even to confess that I'm engaging these thoughts would scare some people, but if we don't engage our thoughts and questions, what's the alternative? So, let me go on with my confession...

If the Bible talks about Grace abounding/increasing much more than sin (Rom 5), why doesn't it seem like that is reality at times? It says, for example;

"...just as the result of one trespass was condemnation for all men, so also the result of one act of righteousness was justification that brings life for all men. Uh? For just as through the disobedience of the one man, the many were made sinners, so also through the obedience of the one man the many will be made righteous. The law was added so that the trespass might increase. But where sin increased, grace increased all the more, so that, just as sin reigned in death, so also grace might reign through righteousness to bring eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord."

Don't rush to accuse me of anything, ok, go ahead if you want to, it's your right, although you might not be right in doing it...sorry, that's another post

I'm just reading the Bible and asking, why does what I read here and my reality seem somewhat at odds?

I'm the last person to take one or even a couple of verses and want to build a theology around it by removing it from the context of the whole story. Having said that, sometimes Sin and it's effect, seems greater than grace and it's effect. You know, round peg, square hole. Don't miss it, the keyword is "seems". Having said that, sometimes it's not always easy to understand these things. Ok, maybe it is for some of you.

I'll keep reading the rest of the story, again, as I do, I confess, sometimes I'm a heretic.

"We are the Balm!"

Yesterday morning, Richview had the privilege of having Colin McCartney, Executive Director of Urban Promise Toronto, address the church family, just a few days after the shooting of Patrick, who was 19, and a street leader for Urban Promise. As a "street leader", Patrick, although still young, was an example and role model in his community. As Colin shared, in tears, "Patrick was a son to the mothers in the community, a brother and helper to the single moms, a father figure and role model to the many children in the community." At 19, Patrick was also the sole guardian for two of his nephews.

Yesterday, we got, you could say, Colin "Raw", his heart, passion and grief without the pleasantries that usually go with being a guest speaker. In tears he reminded us (the Church), "We are the balm!" We, the Church, are to be the healing agent in this world! We need to change the "us and them" mentality, when we think of our black communities. He accused us, he did, and was probably right, of probably thinking Patrick was just another bad black kid, caught up in all the wrong things that go on in "those" communities. And then he shared, as only one who's living it out can; we, the Church, are the hope for these communities, our communities, God's loved communities, God's loved children. He shared with us how Patrick was a good kid, who came up through the system and beat the system. He stayed in his community and became a life line to it, a sign of hope. In the end, it cost him his life. But his testimony remains as a ray of hope, an example of a better way, an example of Jesus' priorities becoming our priorities, an example of surrender.

We were reminded, Christ is the only real hope, real answer, not goverment or more police (they are helpful, but they're not the real answer to meet the real needs). We as Christians have a calling on our lives, ambassadors of the love and the changing power of Jesus Christ. These communities, our communities, are filled with open wounds in need of healing and restoration, and WE ARE THE BALM! But in order for balm to provide healing and restoration, it must be rubbed into the wound. As long as these communities remain "those communities" and the people remain "those people" we won't see the power of God doing what it does best, bring healing, restoration, and light that overcomes the darkness.

It's a powerful thing when the heart of God is clearly displayed before you and you are left with only one option - when you know the heart of God and you realize there are discrepancies between your heart and his heart, how will you respond?

We closed with an individual prayer time, asking God to show us, what would he have us, individually and as a church, do? It was great to see God clearly at work in people's lives. I know this will lead to more of our people getting involved in our communities, that's an awesome thing.

Really special, maybe, even, most special to me, was to see several of our teenagers be the first to go and see Colin to ask, "what could we do as a youth group?" Go back a few weeks (Youth Archives) and you'll understand why this is so cool to me. On a lighter note, after the service, several of them, the youth, said they wanted to get some T-shirts made with a quote on it, you guessed it, "We are the balm!".

Thank you Colin for the timely message. Our prayer is that God will continue to heal the grief. And may more "Patricks" rise up, even as a seed dies as bears much fruit.

Breathe deep the breath of God

Politicians, morticians, Philistines, homophobes, Skinheads, Dead heads, tax evaders, street kids, Alcoholics, workaholics, wise guys, dim wits, Blue collars, white collars, war mongers, peace nicks

Breathe deep the Breath of God

Suicidals, rock idols, shut-ins, drop outs, Friendless, homeless, penniless and depressed, Presidents, residents, foreigners and aliens, Dissidents, feminists, xenophobes and chauvinists

Breathe deep the Breath of God

Evolutionists, creationists, perverts, slum lords, Dead-beats, athletes, Protestants and Catholics, Housewives, neophytes, pro-choice, pro-life, Misogynists, monogamists, philanthropists, blacks and whites

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